And I Love Her

A love like ours could never die because it was never alived to begin with. Sometimes I can’t really tell if my wife loves me or not. I think she does or else she wouldn’t bear all that pain to give birth to my wonderful boys. I would never experience what she had gone through, but I get it. Let’s put it this way. If I was the one that had to give birth, we would have no kid. Yes, I am a pussy and I know it. She knows it as well and I am not afraid to admit that in this marriage, I am the bitch.

My wife is a strong, independent woman. Sometimes I even doubted me role in the relationship and just asked her straight out, “Why do you even need me? You seem to be able to do everything yourself.” Sometimes she responded, “I don’t know why either” and sometimes she just gave me that you’re-such-a-dumb-ass look. Whenever I can’t find the right answer, I always draw back to my mom’s theory: either she owed me something in her previous life or I’ll have to pay her back in our next life. I hope it’s the latter because I do want to be with her again if there’s a next life.

As much as we irritate each other to dead at times, we always think and care about each other. We knew from the beginning that the journey ahead of us is rough and treacherous, but we can make it through if we don’t let go. One of our favorite quotes from Lê Uyên Phương’s was “Rồi mai đây đi trên đường đời / Đừng buông tay âm thầm tìm về cô đơn.” (Later, on the journey through life / Don’t let go of my hand to seek your quiet solitude.) These have to be the toughest years of our lives together, but we’re pulling through. Hold on my love, please don’t give up on me. We’ll walk right up to the sun hand in hand.

Three-Year-Old Shit

For the past three years, I have been through a lot of shit, but nothing beat tonight’s shit. After dinner at Red Hot & Blue, I took Dao upstairs for a bath. Suddenly the shit hit me. My head started to pound and I was damn near vomited. If I were stuck in a box with that shit, I would have die.

Something strange about the shit. It was not stinky. It had a light fragrance like someone was putting on some fucked-up, expired cologne. Not sure what he was eaten, but that was the worse shit ever. Even grandpa couldn’t tolerate it. I had to stop breathing as I was taking off his diaper. I was suspecting that he pooped a lot so I told him, “you pooped a lot.” Usually when he looked into it he would agree, “yes, I pooped a lot.” Tonight, however, he said, “I only pooped small ones.” He only pooped a few marble-size balls, but somehow they were killers. For a few minutes, I could understand why American can’t stand the smell of the durian.

Three-year-old must be the most terrible age. Not only their behavior is bad, their shit is also the worst. I told my wife about it and her reply was, “And you think your shit doesn’t smell?” See, you can’t even tell your wife this kind of shit, but that’s good thing that I have a blog. I can rant about shit all I want. I probably lose all my readers after this stinking post, but I can’t help it.

Then again no matter how awful his shit smells or how irritate his attitude gets, I still got mad love for my boy. This is what I called true love. You have to love everything about him even his shit.

Time With My Boys

Monday morning, drove Dao to daycare as usual. Pulled into the parking lot, he started mumbling, “my tummy hurts.” Before I could unbuckle him, he vomited all over his jacket. As I tried to reach for some paper towel, he threw up again all over himself. I told him to stay put and we drove back home. He said “yes” softly and remained quiet the whole way home.

I called off work and stayed with the boys and grandparents. We rebuilt the track on Dao’s table train. We added a bridge and added more rails. I held cu Dan on my arms and played with cu Dao. I had such a wonderful time with them. Dao was behaving quite well. I even got him to eat some rice and stir-fried vegetables grandma made. He took a bite of a string bean and said, “This is amazing.” Amazing? where did he get that word from? Then I got him to nap.

Later on grandma went in to nap with him so I took cu Dan out for a stroll. I walked around the block listening to music for over an hour and he was still napping. The weather was gorgeous and I was so glad to have a day off with the kids. I love interacting with Cu Dao and talking to Cu Dan. He smiles every time I talk to him. He only cries when he’s hungry or dirty. He’s a bit irritated with his eczema at times, but he’s doing really well. I really don’t want him to lose his chubbiness.

Minor Updates on Visualgui

The main navigation for Visualgui has been reworked on small screens to allow more contents showing up on mobile devices. As much as I liked the colorful menu on the previous version, this is more user friendly.

FancyZoom, which being used mainly on the graphic section, is replaced with FancyBox2. FancyZoom worked well for what I needed, but has not been updated since 2008. In addition, FancyZoom doesn’t work with Infinite Scroll, which are used on both sites and motion. FancyBox2, on the other hand, has been reborn with CSS3, responsive design and integrated slideshow. The script loads faster than the previous version and works well with Infinite Scroll.

FancyBox2 is now also used to open Flash files on the motion pieces to improve the user experience. Infinite Scroll breaks the back button; therefore, visitors would lose their spot if they click to view a slideshow. Now they just launch FancyBox and close it when they are done viewing. This is also an issue for the site section and the easiest solution is to open a new window. I know that opening a new window is not recommended, but it makes sense in this case. Users go off my site to see the work I have done and then close the browser when they want to get back to my site for more samples. This method makes much more sense with Infinite Scroll.

I haven’t thought of a major redesign for Visualgui. I did a realign a year ago and still enjoying the simplicity of this site. It allows me to do what I would like to do: showcase my work, add new graphics weekly on the homepage and just write. As you can see, I write quite a bit on this blog and I hardly reread for grammar mistakes. I would love to because every once in a while I reread some of my posts and I can’t even figure out what I had written, but time is nothing I have plenty of these days. With two kids, the only free time I get is from 11pm to one in the morning. At that time, my brain is half asleep and half fried. As a result my posts are not as polished as I like them to be, but I still appreciate the ability to just write.

Santorum’s Advice to Rape Victims: Keep the Baby

Santorum:

I believe and I think that the right approach is to accept this horribly created, in the sense of rape, but nevertheless, in a very broken way, a gift of human life, and accept what God is giving to you. As you know, in lots of different aspects of our life we have horrible things happening. I can’t think of anything more horrible, but nevertheless we have to make the best out of a bad situation. And that is making the best of a bad situation.

This might sound wrong on many levels, but just imagine a rapist raping a girl and telling her, “Look bitch, I am giving you a gift from God.”

Romney’s Dishonesty

Paul Krugman:

Once you’ve decided to hide your beliefs and say whatever you think will get you the nomination, to pretend to agree with people you privately believe are fools, why worry at all about truth?

The truth is that Mr. Romney is so deeply committed to insincerity that neither side can trust him to do what it considers to be the right thing.

Friday Treat

After four days of eating healthy, I decided to treat myself to Eden Center. Headed to Viet Royal for Sautéed Lobster in Shell with Ginger and Scallion. The lobster is a bit small, but not bad at all.

My wife is heading back to work next week. Her maternity leave is up. To cheer her up, I’ll invite her out to lunch next week, maybe next Friday, to try out Sautéed Lobster in Shell with Salt & Pepper. I’ll probably like that better.

Getting Fat

After launching the web site for Renew Body Contour, I am so tempting to get the treatment myself. Thanks to a week straight of Eden Center’s diet (usually a bowl of noodle soup or a big plate of rice with avocado or durian smoothie), I now tipped over 150 pounds, which is the weight I thought I would never exceed. I know I am fat when I weight more than a pregnant woman. It’s definitely not a good thing to work so closed to a vibrant Vietnamese food area. I need to stick to my mixed greens, chicken, tomatoes and grapes. I also need to get back to jogging again. The weather is too damn nice.

I broke so many resolutions already. My wife just sigh when I tell her that I need to stop eating recklessly. On Tuesday, I went to James Hoban’s with a few of my closed former colleagues. After a few gin and tonic, I went for a big bacon burger. Man, it was heaven-sent. I couldn’t resist the temptation because I was so happy for one of them for taking on a new job four months after me. We worked together and the circumstand and the situation pulled us tighter together. That’s something to be pondered in another post.

Daddy Did It

If nothing else, the boys take after me their loud farts. Nowadays Cu Dan trumpets really loud when he poops, but the funny thing is that Cu Dao immediately blamed on me, “Daddy dit (farted).” I was like, “No, I didn’t do it. Your lil brother did it.”

We got complaints from Dao’s teachers that him and his best buddy played together as well as fought against each other. Grandma asked him why he got into the fight with his best friend and his reply was, “Aidan quay qua (acted naughty).”

Reworked George Mason Law on Small Screens

I rolled out a major update on George Mason Law last night to improve the user experience on small screen devices. The massive amount of links on the header and the navigation take up the entire screen on the iPhone. When users clicked on a nav item, they couldn’t tell that the page is being loaded below the screen. I have pondered upon the issue for a while and finally figured out a solution.

I made the logo smaller and moved the entire header and navigation to the bottom of the page for small screens. I added two links at the top of the page: “skip to content” and “skip to navigation.” Users can get direct to content or navigation with just one click or tap. With the smaller logo and navigation out of the way, the content is now moved up higher on the small devices. For large screens, I moved the entire header back to the top of the page using CSS absolute positioning.

What I really like about this approach is the improve in accessibility and SEO. Users with screen readers don’t have to go through all of the nav links to get to the main content. Search engines could also get to the information much faster because the content is higher on the page.

The beauty of the web is that we can still make changes after the site has launched.

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