Minh Tuyet – Da Khong Con Hoi Tiec

Love her or loathe her, Minh Tuyet is a pop phenomenon. While most of her peers come, shake up the music scene, and then gone, Minh Tuyet is going to be around for a long time. What is her secret recipe? She turns instant Ramen into a savory noodle house with Chinese-inflected flavors and doses of SMG prepared by the CEO of pop franchise Tung Chau.

With her new release, Da Khong Con Hoi Tiec, Minh Tuyet continues to hone her skill as an operatic actress of song, which is her ability to make even the most exaggerated lyrics convincing. On “I am Sorry,” the Vietglish chorus, “I am sorry, I am sorry, em van anh tron kiep loi thu tha,” seems laughable, but she comes across like she means every damn word she sings. On “Hoang Mang,” she phrases, “Vi anh lanh lung bang gia / con toi con tim that tha / Nen minh toi om long dem nhuc nhoi,” like an Academy-award winner, full of heart-breaking melodramas.

An old high school buddy of mine who used to work at Diamond informed me that Minh Tuyet packed the club every time she came through. Even though she likes to capture our heart, she doesn’t want to abandon our feet either. The Latin-groove “Trai Tim Trao Anh” and the title track are for her club heads.

Before many elites among us condemning me for giving such an artless artist a free pass, let me explain. As much as I want to smack her upside the head, I can’t hate her for getting paid by the industry to be mediocre. I don’t give up. I give in.

Fiona Apple Sings Jazz

Jazz artists cover pop songs is nothing new, but a contemporary rock star who does jazz is hard to find. With her raspy vocals and piano chops, Fiona Apple does justice to “Why Try To Change Me Now.”

Tran Thai Hoa – Tinh Khuc Tien Chien

Tran Thai Hoa has never been an interpreter. He is an appreciator. With his latest release, he pays homage to Tinh Khuc Tien Chien (pre-war ballads) rather than reinvigorating them. No crime in that.

He reuses some of the formulas in the past that worked for him. Doan Chuan and Tu Linh’s “La Thu” gets a similar bluesy vibe he has recorded before, but it still sounds luscious with his charming voice. On the tango-flavor “Bong Chieu Ta” (Nhat Bang) and paso-double “Dung Buoc Giang Ho” (Hoang Trong), he proves once again that his vocals have rhythm for ballroom styles, even though his feet have none, as we have witnessed on Thuy Nga’s Celebrity Dancing.

With intimate arrangements, Tran Thai Hoa wraps his harmless pipe around the timeless tunes such as Vao Cao’s “Cung Dan Xua,” “Suoi Mo,” “Truong Chi,” Doan Chuan and Tu Linh’s “La Do Muon Chieu” and “Goi Gio Cho May Ngan Bay” like a latex condom. He plays safe, never breaks out of his comfort position and only sticks to what he could perform best. Then again, nothing’s wrong with getting pleasures out of protected sex. Of course, it’s not as stimulating, but still enjoyable.

King Bryant

Damn, even Lil Wayne is making a record about “Kobe Bryant.” I like LeBron’s aggressive attack, but I have to give consistency to Kobe who never seems to have a bad game. Without a doubt, the Lakers will win the championship this season. Kobe is just unstoppable.

Facebook Killed the Car

In P.J. O’Rourke’s humorous opinion:

Facebook destroyed “cruising the burger stand.” You could have two Corvettes and drive them both at the same time and not look as cool as you could make yourself look on Facebook. Corvettes come with a lot of accessories, but not Photoshop. And what with e-mailing, tweeting, texting and cell phonery, boys and girls could meet each other at the speed of light.

Iggy Pop – Préliminaires

Iggy Pop turns to jazz standards because he ”just got sick of listening to idiot thugs with guitars.” Although he takes inspiration from Louis Armstrong and Jelly Roll Morton, Préliminaires feels more like European pop than jazz. He flips “Les Feuilles Mortes,” one of the most covered jazz ballads, into a nihilistic French romance. On “King of the Dogs,” the only track that comes close to jazz, his low, raspy vocals drown out by the New Orlean jazz band. Dare I say that the Godfather of Punk ain’t got no chops for jazz? Prove me wrong, Mr. Iggy.

Tennis or Tits?

Seventeen-year-old Simona Halep is blessed with a pair of 34DD cans and a talent for tennis. Even though her fans, mostly men, beg her not to, she is getting her big, natural breasts reduced. I am sure her boobs have to do with her 264th ranking in the world, but I not so sure if she could advanced into the top 20 after the reduction. While I am in no business of telling her what to do with her body, I challenge her to keep both. With hard work and determination, she could pull it off. Check her out!

Egg-Boiling Trick

How can you tell when an egg is done boiling? I am not sure if you know this trick already, but I just learned it the other day from a my mom’s friend (who learned it from her father) when I boiled a few dozens of hột vịt lộn (balut). For the obvious reasons, you don’t want to undercook or overcook hột vịt lộn.

Before getting to the trick, let me declare that I finally gain back my love for hột vịt lộn. For a period of time, I gave up on hột vịt lộn because of the westerners’ influence and how they have made such a big wuss out of it. A white guy once told me that he couldn’t eat hột vịt lộn because it looks like abortion. That image haunted me for a while. What help me get back to the groove are salt, pepper, lime juice, tons of hot sauce and shots of Patrón. I still can’t eat hột vịt lộn without those ingredients, especially the liquor.

Let’s get back to the egg-boiling trick. My mom’s friend said that if you could pick up the egg with a pair of chopsticks than the egg is ready. Three of us tried it and we all dropped it back into the pot. Half an hour or so later, I picked it up again and I didn’t drop it. It’s a very nifty trick, but I doubt that it would work with many westerners.