I have been unintentionally neglected my boy Dao. I paid way too much attention to the little guy even when they were both under my watch. Dan has started to walk already, but he’s still putting things in his mouth. I could not take my eye off him for 30 seconds. On the other hand, Dao could play all by himself.

When we visited my mom, Dao played with his cousin Eric most of the time until Eric got bored or worn out. Dao was feeling sad when Eric had no desire to play with him. I could see it on his face so I handed Dan to his mom and played with him. He showed me how to fix the train track using his fist as a hammer. He looked adorable.

Dao definitely wanted someone to play with. Unfortunately his little brother isn’t one. Unlike Dao, Dan knocked things all over and Dao didn’t like that. I tried to explain to him that Dan is too young to understand the proper way to play and I offered to help him fixing up whatever Dan messed up. He seemed to like that.

Yesterday around noon, Dao refused to eat and said that he was tired and wanted to go to sleep. I thought he tried to get out of eating so yelled at him a bit and took him to bed. Five minutes later he slept on my arms. I felt horrible for yelling at him earlier. I rubbed his back and gave him kisses. He held my hand even though he was already sleeping. My baby could be so lovely when he wanted to.

Dan’s blood test result is in. He’s moderately allergic to white egg, milk, soy and shrimp. He’s highly allergic to peanut. The doctor subscribed 4 packs of EpiPen for both kids and recommended to take them both to allergy pediatrician.

True be told, I never paid much attention to allergy until I become a father. I am either lucky or don’t know any better because I can’t think of a type of food I can’t eat, but I can think of what type of food would give me diarrhea. I can’t imagine what it would be like if I have food allergy. The positive outcome would probably be I wouldn’t get so fucking fat. Lately I have been getting so ridiculously hungry at night and I always ending up eating something around one in the morning.

Now the kids have all kind of food allergy. I really feel bad for Dan because he loves food as much as I do. He would eat anything we give him. So now we have to eliminate food that he’s allergic to. Fortunately I don’t care much about peanut. I wouldn’t miss it if I don’t eat it again ever.

My car stereo died on me last week; therefore, I have been commuting with no music. This evening when I parked my car at Dao’s daycare, I put on my headphone and listened to Thanh Thao’s remix album for ten minutes before picking him up. Once we were in the car and driving home, one of the songs stuck in my head so I sang out loud: “Thà là bỏ đi hết ta làm lại từ đầu / Thà là bỏ đi hết ta chẳng nợ gì nhau.” Dao immediately told me, “Daddy, don’t sing.” I asked him why and he replied, “I am allergic to your song.” I flipped out hysterically. That has to be one of the most hilariously sad criticisms I have ever heard.

Not sure what prompted me to ask Dao, “Are you a train?” He replied, “No, you silly. I am not a train. I am a people. I have feet. Trains don’t have feet. Trains have wheels.” Sounds like he made his case clear.

As we were stuck in traffic on our way home yesterday, Dao said, “Cars please move out of the way so we can go home.” I asked him, “Why do you want to go home?” He replied, “So I can see my mommy. She’s my best friend.” I asked, “Am I your best friend?” He said, “No, I am not your best friend. Baby is your best friend.” I said, “Oh I see. Baby is my best friend. I miss my baby.” He said, “And I miss my mommy.” He made his case once again.

The other night, Dao took a dump in the potty, got up and shouted, “Daddy, daddy, I pooped butterfly.” I took a look and his shits somehow curled up like a shape of a butterfly. I invited my wife to take a peek and we laughed hysterically. Dao actually is more of a visual guy than me.

The funny thing is that Dao poops a lot even though he hardly eats much. On the other hand, Dan eats everything and yet he poops so little. He does only once a day and his shits look like chocolate chips (the ones that you put in cookies). The biggest he created is about the size of a Hershey’s Kiss. Sorry if I ruined your appetite.

By the way, our little Dan has started to walk. Love seeing him taking his first steps.

Mỗi lần nhìn thấy mặt con nổi đỏ trầy trụa ba đau xót vô cùng. Thảm thương hơn là thấy con vẫn cười. Có ngứa và đau lắm không con? Đêm đến thấy con đưa tay lên gãi ba cố nắm lấy tay con để con khỏi phải gãi chóc da nhưng con không thích lắm.

Dạo này con cũng hay thức giấc rồi khóc to. Những lúc ba chỉ vuốt nhẹ lên lưng con để con ngủ trở lại. Có lúc ba để con khóc một hồi rồi ngủ trở lại. Đêm qua con không mãi không thôi. Ba la một tiếng “nín” thì con lại nín. Một lúc sao con lại khóc tiếp ba lại la thêm tiếng nữa thì con cũng nín. Bây giờ mỗi khi ru con ba cũng để tự con ngũ. Con nhào qua lộn lại cho đến khi lắng xuống rồi thiếp đi. Ba chỉ đỡ khi nào con xắp đập đầu vào tường.

Bây giờ con chập chuẩn đi. Trông tướng con rất dể thương. Giờ đây con cũng đã bớt bỏ đồ vào miệng. Con đã biết tự chơi một mình. Con biết cách đẩy xe chạy tự nhặt lên những gì con thích. Thấy con phát chuyển tốt và khoẻ ba vui mừng lắm. Mỗi ngày ba tự cười thằm và vui vẻ về hai thằng con trai của ba.

Cái cảm giác làm cha thật khó tả. Mỗi một suy nghỉ của ba điều liên quan đến hai con. Có những lúc ba thật mệt mỏi và muốn được yên tỉnh một mình. Nhưng rồi những thứ ba làm ba điều đắng đo rằng nếu ba làm những việc ấy mà phải không có thời gian với hai con, ba có nên làm không? Dỉ nhiên là không. Tiền thì chẳng bao giờ kiếm cho đủ còn tụi con thì mỗi ngày mổi lớn. Thời gian không bao giờ dừng lại. Mới ngày nào Đạo còn nhỏ xíu mà bây giờ đã có cá tính riêng. Mới ngày nào ôm Đán trọn trong tay mà bây giờ đeo con một chút là bị đao lưng đao cổ.

Anyways, I love you guys.

Whenever Dao plays with his model trains, he has to have five cars as a set. I didn’t really get it until the other day when he asked me to set up my train to play with him. I just put together a bunch of trains, but he said, “No daddy, you have to the main engine first [Thomas, Percy, James etc.], then tender second, then freight car, then two cabooses.” My son is now officially a connoisseur of train. Here is their early Christmas present.

We were at a model train show and Dao spotted a small table with small trains. He told me, “Daddy, that’s a very small, tiny, little engine.” Even the man behind the booth was surprised how small Dao had described his trains.

While stuck at the red light I said, “Come on, I want to go home.” Dao followed up, “Please green light, we want to go home.”

At another stop light he spotted a man crossing the street and asked me, “Daddy, why is he walking home?” I reply, “He’s walking because he doesn’t have a car.” He went on, “Why doesn’t he have a car?” I said, “Because he doesn’t have money to buy a car.” I wanted to give him the value of money so I went on, “Like when you want to buy a toy, you have to have money. Do you know where the money come from?” He responded, “From the piggy bank.” I was like, “No, no. You have to work to earn money.”

As for out lil Dan, he has been mumbling quite a bit lately. He baby-talks all the time and has started to repeat what we say. Like when we say his name, he would say it back but not quite correct yet. He also knows the word “đèn” (light). Every time I say the word “đèn,” he would repeat it and look up to the lights. We’re predicting that he’ll probably talk more than his older brother since he already started early.

Height: 29.74 (50%)
Weight: 22lbs 7oz. (75%)
HC: 18.5″ (75%)

His height at 50% is understandable. Both of his parents are pretty short. His head is now as big as Dao’s and his weight will surpass his brother pretty soon if he’s keep eating the way he does. I can feed him all day long if I wanted to. He understands when we ask him to clap his hands and weave goodbye. He’s babbling quite a bit already. He seems to be a happy kid. He laughs pretty loud, but he screams even louder. He hasn’t shown anything that he liked except for food.

You’re turning one today my dear and you have lived through the one of toughest years of our lives yet. While life is rough, I am thankful to have you in my arms every night. Your presence keeps me going. Watching you sleep is the most peaceful moment of my day. Seeing you standing on your own feet has to be one of the greatest joys of my life.

It won’t be too long before you start to walk. You have started talking quite a bit already. You can tell the different between strangers and the ones you see everyday; however, you play with anyone who interacts to you. You still have a great appetite. Like me, you don’t turn down food. Feeding you is such a rewarding experience. I don’t have to force you. You just eat until you’re full. You have turned down baby food. At times we restrict you from a certain food to avoid allergies. Once we have a better idea of your tolerance, I promise you that you can have anything that we eat.

One thing I would love to see you change is to stop exploring everything with your mouth and tongue. Once you get over that, I’ll be more relaxed and let you roam free. For now we have to keep an eye on you at all time.

Happy birthday, love.