The last few months has been tough dealing with Dao as he is going through his terrible-two phase. He would say no to everything as if his brain had been wired to do so. Do you want to brush your teeth? No. Do you want to change new clothes? No. Do you want to take a bath? No. Do you want to play with iPod? No. Then he changed his mind. Yes, I want iPod.

He fought back everything I do for him. At times, I just shut out and let him do whatever he wanted. I wouldn’t hold him in my arms to sleep and I wouldn’t read him a book. He would get frustrated and butted his head against my nose when I tried to closed my eyes pretending to sleep. Lucky I didn’t have a nose surgery or else it would have been broken so many times. When I just couldn’t take it anymore, I just walk away and let him scream.

I couldn’t take control of the situation and I ended up letting him gets his way. Then I realized that I am not fit to be a dad, but it’s a bit too late now since another boy is coming out soon. How am I going to handle the two of them?

Fortunately things are getting a bit better now. He still says no and still hates brushing, but he is more cooperative. Things are done much faster now and I get him out of the house by 8am and getting to bed by 9pm. I am not sure if he’s getting off his terrible-two state or I am getting accustomed to his rebellious.

Daycare sent Dao home Monday afternoon for a high fever. I took off Tuesday to take care of him. He fussed and refused everything from food to milk to water. I had to take him to the shopping mall train to get him to eat. We sat in the food court and watched the train goes by. I made a deal with him. If he eats we would get to ride the train. If not we just go home. He screamed and screamed, but he knew he better eat to get on the train.

Tuesday night, he got better and could be back to daycare the next day, but grandparent drove down just in case he would still be out sick. He ended up staying home for the rest of the week and didn’t want to back to daycare. He loves spending time with grandma because she plays with him as much as he wants to. None of us could do that except for grandma and he knows it. He was sitting on he coach, watching Jay Jay, leaning on her and eating a cheese sandwich like a little king.

While grandma was occupied with Dao, grandpa fixed things around the house. The damn towel bar in the bathroom kept falling off the wall because I couldn’t nail though the wood. I put on compound and screwed it back in. It fell off again the next day; therefore, I just left it like that. I was just going to get rid of it, but I hadn’t have the time. Yesterday, I discovered the bar was back on the wall and tightly secured. I need to ask him how did he do it. He also made a holder for Dao’s bathtub. It looks pretty clever.

It’s always a great pleasure having the grandparent visiting us. They’ll off to Cancun with my sister-in-law and her husband for five days. I am sure they’ll appreciate the quietness and the relaxation after what they had been through with the little kid.

Dao has a great memory and remembers most of the books we have read; therefore, I liked to do a bit of interactive reading with him. For example, when we read Dr. Seuss’s ABC, I said “A” and he said “alligator.” I said “B” and he said “bumblebee.” I said “C” and he said “camel.” When we got to “I,” however, he said “gai,” which means scratch in Vietnamese, but the actual word is “itchy.”

Another book that he liked to read is P.D. Eastman’s “Are You My Mother?” He started out with, “A mother bird sat on her egg. The egg jumped.” The I read the next few lines with him filling in the sentences. When we got to page eight, he got up, jumped and yelled out, “the egg jumped. It jumped, and jumped, and jumped.” Then I said, “Out came…” He screamed, “the baby bird!” He also said, “I am too loud.” I replied, “Yes, you are.”

One of our favorite books is Dr. Seuss’s Oh, the Places You’ll Go. Here’s how we read it:

Me: Congratu…
Dao: lations!
Me: Today is…
Dao: your day.
Me: You’re off to…
Dao: Great Places!
Me: You’re off and…
Dao: away.
Me: You have brains in your…
Dao: head.
Me: You have feet in your…
Dao: shoes.
Me You can steer yourself any direction you…
Dao: choose.
Me: You’re on your…
Dao: own.
Me: And you know what you…
Dao: know.
Me: And YOU are the guy who’ll decide…
Dao: where to go.

My mother was discharged from the hospital on Sunday. She’s recuperating. Thanks to all of you who sent her love and prayers. When she was taken to the hospital, the first thing came to my mind was that please don’t let her ended up like her sister who had a stroke more than a decade ago and has been in bed ever since. Friday night when I visited her in the hospital, she was murmuring some words while sleeping and she looked so much weaker than two weeks ago when we were in Mexico.

When I went back to Lancaster last week, Dao and Dana didn’t come with me. I didn’t want a pregnant woman and a little kid to be around the hospital. Saturday I was sitting by my mom’s side watching the snow fell and I missed them so much. I missed hearing the little one talks. I missed hanging around with him. I missed reading our favorite book together (Oh! The Places You Go). Heck I even missed the moments that he drove me to the wall like brushing his teeth and getting him to sleep. Yes, I had those moments when I said in my head, “Go the F to Sleep.” I didn’t see him for three days and it seemed like forever. Then I realized that the last time I saw my father was in 2001. Damn, time goes by so fast.

I also missed my wife even though we only communicate with each other on the basic level. These days if we go any further than that, we would ended up arguing. If we talk to the point where I started to feel comfortable, I would bring up my problems and she is sick and tired of hearing them. I am sure you’re pretty tired of hearing them too if you follow this blog. Carrying the baby is already hard enough; therefore, I try my best to keep my own issues to myself and not giving her anymore burden.

Dao was being a very good boy today. He helped me clean up the toys and organize the house; therefore, I took him out for a treat. First we went mini-golfing and he made a hole in one. Then he ate almost an entire jumbo hotdogs and popcorns. After that we headed over to the ghost train. We had to wait for half an hour just to get on the train. Though the ride was filled with fun Halloween spirit, Dao was ready for a nap.

After the ride was over, I gave him milk and drove around town enjoying the beautiful red and yellow autumn leaves and listening to Sophie Milman’s latest album In the Moonlight. I got this album a few weeks ago, but haven’t had a chance to really listen to it in its entirety until now. I liked the album so much that I stopped by Starbucks drive-through, grabbed me a venti cup of coffee frappuccino, turned off the engine and wrote a review on a piece of napkin. I really miss blogging about music now that I no longer have the luxury to do so.

After that I drove around bait more and then headed home. As soon as I put the car into park, he woke up. He didn’t want to go back in and wanted to go table train so we headed to Barnes and Noble. He played train, lego and read some books. Before we knew it, it was already 7 p.m. so we better headed home. It was indeed a fulfilled father-and-son day. I can’t ask for more than these precious moments together. I did leave all of my own issues behind while I was with him.

After reading a few of Dao’s favorite books, I turned off the light to go to sleep.

Dao: Dao co [have] sticker.
Dad: O dau Dao co sticker? [Where did you get the sticker?]
Dao: Co Jeannette cho Dao. [Ms. Jeannette cho Dao.]
Dad: Tai sao co Jeannette cho Dao sticker? [Why did Ms. Jeannette give Dao sticker?]
Dao: Dao helped clean up… Dao bo [put] train vo ro [in the basket]… Dao shared toys voi ban [with friends]… Dao shared train, truck and airplane.
Dad: Good boy. I am so proud of you.
Dao: Thank you, daddy.

Dao picks up quite a bit of new words from school. Last week, we had steamed escargot and fish sauce with ginger. He loved it so much that he busted out, “It’s delicious.”

When we give him a compliment for doing something good, he said, “Dao is excellent.”

I was tickling his ear this morning. He giggled and said, “Ba not nice.” (I am pretty sure he picked this up from his mom.)

Yesterday evening he wanted to get out of the car seat, but we didn’t let him. He said, “I hate you.” I was like, “what did you just say?” He repeated again. This one probably comes from one of his friends at daycare.

Hôm nay và ngày mai nhà trẻ đóng cửa để ăn mừng năm mới của người Do thái. Bà xã bận công việc nên tôi lấy hai ngày phép để trông con mặc dù thứ tư tuần tới là ngày cuối cùng cho việc làm hiện tại. Xếp mới nhất (xếp thứ ba của tôi trong vòng sáu tháng) cũng thông cảm.

Sáng nay dậy cũng sớm nhưng hai cha con nằm xem iPod đến mười giờ. Đạo muốn đi xe lửa ở trong mall nên hai cha con mới xuống dường. Đánh rang, thai đồ, ăn sáng xong và khi láy xe đến nơi khoảng 11 giờ thì Đạo đã thăng. Đành láy về nhà lại rồi bê cả con lẩn ghế vào nhà để con ngủ tiếp. Tôi cũng nằm ghế sofa suy nghỉ vớ vẩn nhưng rồi thiếp đi được một tí.

Đến 2 giờ Đạo mới dậy. Đói meo ruộc nên hai cha con dắt nhau ra Chipotle ăn trưa. Hai cha con đá sạch tô burito thịt bò. Đạo ăn ngon lành cơm, đậu và rau. Tôi cũng làm thêm một ly margarita. Ăn xong no nê, chúng tôi kéo nhau vào mall lại.

Đạo rất thích được đi xe lửa chạy vòng trong mall. Hôm nay ngày thường nên không có ai đi cả. Ông tài xế cũng định nghỉ luôn thì thấy có hai cha con. Vì biết Đạo là khách quen nên ổng cũng láy. Nguyên một đoàn xe chỉ có hai cha con đi thôi. Đoạn đường chạy rất ngắn. Một vòng chừng hai phút nên mỗi chuyến được hai vòng.

Tuy thời gian rất ngắn ngủi như tôi cảm thấy rất bình thản. Nhìn con ngồi yên rất hồn nhiên làm tôi cũng thấy thoải mái và nhẹ nhỏm. Tôi định trả thêm 20 đồng nửa để hai cha con được thêm 8 vòng thư giản nhưng thôi để cho ông tài xế nghỉ.

Chỉ cần những giây phút như vậy đối với tôi hiện bây giờ thật sự quá hạnh phúc. Tôi rất mông ước được có thể trở lại tuổi âu thơ như Đạo nhưng điều đó không thể nào được. Thôi thì tạo cho con được những ngây phút thơ ngây và hồn nhiên đó để sau ngày nó không núi tiếc như mình bây giờ.

One of Dao’s favorite bedtime stories is Are You My Mother? by P.D. Eastman. A baby bird hatched while his mother went out to look for his food. As the baby bird searching for his mother, Dao asked, “Trung dau roi [Where is the egg]? I replied, “Trung be roi [Egg is broken].” Dao responded, “That’s so sad.”

Then he gave me a report from school today: “Daniel pushed Dao… in the gym… Dao nga [fell]… Dao khoc [cried]… Co [Ms] Jeanette kissed Dao.” I kissed him, held him tight and he fell asleep. Not a bad night at all.

I think about you the day that we knew you will be coming, but you have been on my mind a lot as the days are getting closer. Your brother, your mother and I are very eager to welcome you into this world and our family. Your mom has been telling me that you have been very well behaved. I am glad to hear.

Your grandpa has given us some names for you, but I not settled on any yet. Do you know what you want to be named? Please make up your mind and let me know before you arrived. I am just kidding. Just kick back and relax while you can. Enjoy being in your own little word because that will change completely in another 90 days or so. But don’t you worried. We will be there for you every step of the way and that is my promise to you.

I love you very much. Be good to your mother.

Daddy