Last week, we took some time off to take the kids to the beach. Despite the cold water, the strong wind, and the crashing waves, we had a great time together. It was nice to have the time just for our little family. Nevertheless, we had very little down time with the four active boys.

As the boys are growing and demanding their own time, I don’t know how many more times we can spend together. I want to use my time on earth to make memories. As I am aging, I don’t know when my time will be up. It might sound cynical, but we don’t know when we will be running out of time.

As we spent our time on the beach, we also attended my mother-in-law’s sister’s funeral. She lived a wonderful life and spent her time last with her loved ones before she left. If I were to have as much time as her on earth, I would have about 43 years left. Given how unhealthy I have become and how stressful I always carried with me, I don’t think I have that much time left.

As I am getting older and seeing people leaving this earth, I often think about my own time. A close friend of mine drowned in his teenage time. A heart attack robbed the time of another close friend of mine when he was in his 30s. My parents, aunts, and uncles have lost their time to illnesses.

As time passed me by, I realized that I had wasted so much of my time. I spent too much time worrying about things that might happen such as losing the ability to feed my family, raising my kids wrong, drifting away from the love of my life, and fading into darkness.

Nowadays, I just want to treasure the present time that I have. I can’t spend too much time worrying about things that I don’t have control over. I can’t even control my own time. Only time will tell.

In last night’s VP debate, JD Vance proved to be a skillful communicator. He performanced well in the first half in hammering Kamala Harris on the economy, even though it was the Biden Administration. In contrast, Tim Walz was a bit nervous. He should have given a straight answer on his trip to China. He got the date wrong. So what? It was 35 years ago. Move on.

In the second half, Walz came out swinging on abortion and democracy. He cornered Vance on the 2020 election result and Vance gave a “damning non-answer.” Vance pivoted and revealed his dishonesty. He knew damn well that he could not cross the Trump line.

Vance succeed in the VP debate where Trump had failed in the presidential debate. Vance out-performed Trump on Trump’s own policies. Too bad, Vance is not on the top of the ticket. He is still running as Trump’s Vice Puppet—not Vice President.

Vance demonstrated his debating skills, but has also proved further that he is not trustworthy. He knew what to say to advance his political career even if he had to lie to himself and to the American people. Even Trump knows this guy is not to be trusted. Vance will betray him to get to the top. Let’s wait and see.

Paul Caron writes on the TaxProf Blog:

George Mason University’s Antonin Scalia Law School will have incurred more than $38 million in losses over five years by the end of its 2025 fiscal year, according to budget projections shared with the wider university’s board of visitors at a meeting Thursday.

Here’s the breakdown:

The annual losses the school has posted have increased nearly every year, from $3.8 million in 2020, to $3.3 million, $4.3 million, $5.8 million and $7.8 million in the years following. In its 2025 fiscal year, the law school is projected to lose $13.2 million.

I don’t know anything about the school financial situation, but I am not surprised either.

Andrew Solomon writes for The New Yorker:

Social media acts on the same neurological pleasure circuitry as is involved in addiction to nicotine, alcohol, or cocaine. Predictable rewards do not trigger this system nearly as effectively as unpredictable ones; slot-machine manufacturers know this, and so do social-media companies. “Teens are insatiable when it comes to ‘feel good’ dopamine effects,” a Meta document cited in the attorneys general’s complaint noted. Instagram “has a pretty good hold on the serendipitous aspect of discovery…. Every time one of our teen users finds something unexpected their brains deliver them a dopamine hit.” Judith Edersheim, a co-director of the Center for Law, Brain & Behavior, at Harvard, likens the effect to putting children in a twenty-four-hour casino and giving them chocolate-flavored bourbon. “The relentlessness, the intrusion, it’s all very intentional,” she told me. “No other addictive device has ever been so pervasive.”

Social-media platforms harness our innate tendency to compare ourselves with others. Publication of the number of likes, views, and followers a user garners has made social-media platforms arenas for competition. Appearance-enhancing filters may make viewers feel inadequate, and even teen-agers who use them may not register that others are doing the same. Leah Somerville, who runs the Affective Neuroscience and Development Lab, at Harvard, has demonstrated that a thirteen-year-old is likelier to take extreme risks to obtain peer approval than a twenty-six-year-old, in part because the limbic system of the adolescent brain is more activated, the prefrontal cortex is less developed, and communication between the two areas is weaker.

A heartbreaking, frightening read for parents. Being a father of four kids, I live in fear everyday about children digital addictions.

After several failed attempts to upgrade Ubuntu 22.04 to 24.04.1 early this month, I was doing some research to migrate off DigitalOcean. My first choice for this WordPress-powered blog was WP Engine. After the controversy between WordPress and WP Engine unfolded, I was debating between WordPress.com and Pressable, both owned by Automattic. I still haven’t made up my mind.

I still don’t know where to move my PHP sites, which I put them all in one DigitalOcean’s Droplet. I don’t want to go back to shared hosting plans. I need a managed cloud hosting solution. I haven’t dug far enough. I was doing research on running my own server in my house, but that seems like a terrible idea. So I scrapped that.

I still don’t know what to do with the hosting for all of my sites, especially in the long run when I will no longer alive. I guess they should all evaporate with me. I shouldn’t even be thinking that far.

Today I tried to upgrade to Ubuntu 24.04.1 LTS again. Of course, I created snapshots before I did. To my surprise, the upgrade worked for both Droplets. It was a huge relief. I am going to stay with DigitalOcean for a bit longer. Maintaining Ubuntu keeps me up-to-date with backend development.

Running two Droplets costs me $35 a month. They are more than what I wanted to pay. I was thinking off combining all my sites into one Droplet, but I am not sure if that’s a good idea.

My Daring Vương,

I can’t believe you are turning 6 today. My baby boy is growing up fast. You continue to prove that you can do anything when you put your mind to it and you only do things on your own terms. When you decided to ski on your own, you just told me to get rid of the harness. When you made up your mind to switch from the balance bike to scooter, you went for it.

I am so glad that you have decided to join Liên Đoàn Hùng Vương’s Cub Scout this year. You only attended a couple of the meetings, but the leaders had already noticed your potential and dedication. You even started a patrol yell. I am looking forward to our bonding times together with the cubs. You will have a great time with your brother Xuân at camping activities.

At a young age, you already showed signs of independence. You don’t need my help to do things for you even though a task could take you a long time to accomplish. I like that attitude in you. The sooner you can do things on your own, the better off you will be out in the world. Maybe, being the forth boy in the family makes you become more independent. Your mother and I had seen so many tricks your brothers had pulled before; therefore, we don’t pamper you as much. No doubt, you still get the most love for being the youngest.

Your standout quality has to be your strong mind. You don’t let anything around distract you. You don’t let anyone get to you. You have no problem playing in a group, but you are also comfortable playing by yourself with your dinosaurs. I love our verbal interactions, in which we trash talk each other. Even with your limited vocabulary, you know how to attack me and try to get under my skin. The reason I am battling you is because I know you can take it. I also want to prepare you to stay strong when insults thrown your way. Talk is cheap. Don’t let people get under your skin.

Happy birthday, Vương. I have nothing but love for you.
Dad

In the last couple of days, I am following the battle between WordPress and WP Engine. On Wednesday Matt Mullenweg banned WP Engine from access WordPress.org. This ban has a huge impact on us. George Mason University hosts hundreds or even maybe thousands of is WordPress sites on WP Engine. The Scalia Law Sites, which powered by WordPress MultiSite, is also on WP Engine. I hope the issue will resolve quickly.

Virginia started early voting last Friday. We came and we left. The line was too long. We came back today and there was no line at all. We cast our ballots in less than five minutes. We did our civic duty. Now we just sit back and wait for the result.

Whether you will vote early or on election day, go vote. If you are still undecided, it is not too late to do your research. I already made up mind. I voted for Kamala Harris and Tim Walz for president and vice president, Tim Kaine for US Senator, and Gerry Connolly for 11^th Congressional District Congressman.

I suppose I am a Democrat.

Reading Wendy MacNaughton’s How to Say Goodbye brought back the vivid memory of my mother’s last moment on earth.

After they pulled the plugs on her, we had less than a minute to say goodbye. I spoke to her in Vietnamese, “Mẹ, please let yourself go. I love you and you will always be in my heart. Goodbye for now.” A tear rolled down her eye. She stopped breathing. My mother left this world.

This illustrated little book is an honest, heartfelt, and helpful guide on how to say goodbye to someone you love. It’s a gift to see the journey to death through MacNaughton’s visuals and observations. “It’s very courageous to sit with someone while they’re dying.” She wrote, “But you can’t fix this. You’re not in charge. The person dying is in charge.”

Saying goodbye is not easy, but “sometimes it’s just sitting and being there.”

In February, I took a ski lesson at Whitetail. Since it was on a weekday, the snow school was not so busy and I requested to learn carving; therefore, I was assigned to just one instructor. It was a private lesson for the price of a group lesson. While taking lesson, the instructor encouraged me to teach.

I was not serious about it, but her words stayed with me. Last week, on a whim, I applied for a part-time position for a non-certified ski or snowboard instructor. I wrote an honest, enthusiastic cover letter about my love and passion for both skiing and snowboarding. My story paid off. I got accepted two days later.

Without a doubt, I am excited about the opportunities not only to teach, but also to learn. One of the perks for the job is getting free lessons. Just the thought of learning, teaching, and playing on the snow reinvigorated me. I couldn’t wait to share the new endeavor with my wife. Of course, she supported me. I tried to convince her this might be the beginning of my dream career. That was when she brought me back to reality and reminded me of my responsibilities. Right, I have four kids to raise.

The gist of the story is that I can do anything I want as long as I keep my full-time job. It’s all good. I still am enjoying being the director of design and web services. Skiing and snowboarding will keep my body active and my mind strong. It’s a perfect balance between sitting in front of the computer and spending time outdoors.