The past two weeks had been fun but also exhausted. Being a full-time dad is not as easy as I had imagined.

The first week was not so bad since we were on an all-inclusive vacation. We got up around 8, got to breakfast about 9. Around 10 we headed to the swimming pool or the beach. The kids jumped around all over in the shallow water. I just had to keep an eye on them, which was not an easy task because of a few topless sun-bathers around. The mojito kept me focused on the kids.

After that we would head to lunch. At this point the kids got tired and ready for nap. Dao is the exception so I had to push him on the stroller around the property until he would fall asleep. Then I would stop at the bar, picked up a drink, headed to the beautiful landscape area. Let him listened to the waterfall while I enjoyed reading a book.

Once they woke up, we headed into the water again until dinner time. They were once again exhausted so they would go to bed early. Even though we were on vacation, we all went to bed around 9. Other than Dan running all around the property, getting out of his high chair and running all over the restaurants, we had a good time.

Once we headed back to the States, my day started at six in the morning forcefully and didn’t end until 10pm at night. That’s a sixteen-hour shift. When Dan had a fever at night, I was on call as well. I couldn’t sleep and had to check his temperature every fifteen minutes or so. On a good day, I was too exhausted to do my own things after 10pm.

The good thing was that the holiday season in DC has many model train exhibitions. Each day I tried to take them to different show. Staying home a whole day with them would give me massive headaches. The raining days and they days my wife was sick were the worse.

Then again, time spent with them went by so fast. Two weeks also come to an end. I am getting a cold myself. After tomorrow, I go back to work and they will go back to daycare. Life will be back to normal again.

The other day we were jamming to the remix version of Thanh Thảo’s “Bạc Trắng Tình Đời” in the car and Đạo asked me the meaning of the hook: “Thà là bỏ đi hết ta làm lại từ đầu.” I explained to him, “Well, you know when you watch a movie in the car and you ask me to restart the DVD. That’s what it mean.” He was like, “Oh, OK.” I am not even sure why I made such a terrible analogy.

Because of Đạo’s verbal skill, Đán is picking up his chops as well. He speaks with authority. He uses phrases like “Muốn coi TV” (Want to watch TV), “Muốn ăn phở” (Want to eat phở) and “Muốn iPhone.” The other day, he put his hand into his diaper and got poop on his fingers. He ran to me and said, “Trời ơi… My hand… Dơ quá” (Oh God… my hand… so dirty).

Đán is a handful. He’s strong; he’s big; he likes to run; and he has endless energy. His terrible-two phase is much worse than Đạo. Just two days ago, he was like a little sick puppy. Yesterday, he returned to his normal self and he is exhaustive to keep up. Then again, I am glad that he’s healthy.

Three words to describe Dao

• Rational
• Playful
• Friendly

Dao likes to play with

• Trains and cars
• Puzzles
• Blocks (always related to trains)

Dao’s strengths

Dao has strong language development. He takes responsibility for his actions. Dao is easily able to understand why some behaviors are inappropriate for school.

Areas that we are working on

We are working on encouraging Dao to participate more in circle and story times. We are also encouraging him to participate in art and cooking activities despite his aversion to getting dirty.

My thoughts

I was surprised that his teachers gave him positive feedback on his behavior. He gets along well with his classmates and he listens to his teachers. Even when he does something inappropriate, he recognizes it and understands the consequences.

At home, he is different. He always fights with his little brother over toys. Whenever Dan plays with something, he takes from his brother despite how many times I tells him not to do that. Dao is fighting for attention. Whenever I get the chance to be alone with him, he is so sweet and well-behaved. I am still struggling to get the two of them to play well together.

Yesterday they fought over a toy and I confiscated it. I explained that if they can’t share, they won’t get to play the toy at all. Dao picked up another toy and threw it across the room. I made him sat on the coach. He started to cry. Dan came over and gave his brother a big hug. I was angry and touched at the same time.

In his last checkup, which was on December 3, 2013, he weighted 30 lbs and 4 oz (82%) and grew 35 and 1/2 inches (79%) in height.

The last few months, we have witnessed a terrible two at full force. He’s active and aggressive. In our vacation last week at Iberostar in Bayahibe, Dominican Republic, I spent most of my time chasing after him around the resort. The good thing was that Iberostar has two bars from the front desk to swimming pool. Each round, I would get a mojito break.

The time on the airplane was also a nightmare, especially when we left the US to DR. He wouldn’t sit still and he wouldn’t go to sleep because we boarded right on the clock. On our way back, I let him ran all over the airport until boarding time. As soon as we got on the plane, he slept for about an hour before got up and moved around. The experience was less dramatic than the previous flight.

Just about a month ago, his language skills had picked up at a surprising speed. He knows how to comments on things like, “Tàu đẹp quá. Máy bay đẹp quá.” As soon as he woke up (when we were at the hotel), he asked, “Bà ngoại đâu rồi? Muốn bà ngoại.” I replied, “Bà ngoại đang ngủ. Đán ngủ đi.” He responded, “I am not sleeping anymore. That’s it.”

While we were playing in the pool, he grabbed a hold of me and said out of the blue, “I love you, daddy.” Nothing felt better than hearing your son saying that. When we were at the beach, I lost balanced when a strong weave hit us, he asked, “Are you ok, buddy?” He picked that up from me whenever he fell or something.

Yesterday, I tried to feed him some pasta and he refused. I kept on putting the spoon to his mouth and he finally busted out, “No, you eat it.” Witnessing him developing is joy even though it is exhausting to keep up.

Cuối tuần cả nhà kéo nhau đi thưởng thức hương vị quê hương. Đang hớp tô Phở nóng bổng nhiên thằng Đán la lên, “Đụ mẹ.” Mình ngạc nhiên hỏi lại, “Con nói gì vậy?” Nó lập lại, “Đụ mẹ” rồi đẩy chiếc xe đồ chơi đến mẹ nó. Thì ra là nó muốn nói “Đụng mẹ.” Tôi nhìn má nói cười thầm. Mai mốt muốn chưởi ai tôi sẽ dùng, “Đụng mẹ.” Rồi một lúc sau, nó chỉ tôi và nói “Daddy,” chỉ má nó và nói “Mommy,” còn chỉ anh nó thì nói, “Anh Đéo.” Tôi và mẹ nói cũng bó tay luôn. Thằng này nói tiếng Việt nguy hiểm quá. Người lớn mà nghe được chắc nghỉ rằng ba má nó ở nhà chưởi tục cả ngày.

Đắt Tiền

Hôm nọ sau khi đón hai đứa sau giờ học gặp một anh Việt Nam thu dọn ở trường. Lúc chờ thang máy anh hỏi, “Em gởi hai đứa ở đây hả?” Tôi trả lời, “Dạ anh.” Ảnh nói tiếp, “Chắc em làm nhiều tiền lắm nên mới gởi hai đứa vô đây. Ở đây tiền gởi đắt lắm. Tôi mỉm cười và trả lời, “Không gởi tụi nó vô đây thì quăng tụi nó đi đâu?” Ảnh nói, “Sao không để cho bà nội hay mà ngoại trông.” Tôi trả lời tiếp, “Được thì đả làm rồi.”

Dao is now into watching Barbie. How did we get here? He outgrew Curious George and Thomas Train, but I could never imagine he would be into Barbie. Now I really have to pay attention to him even though I think he could differentiate between real and fantasy. For instance, my wife was making fried noodle last weekend and she set the stove on fire because the oil spilled out and started to burn. Dao ran over, looked at the fire and told his mom, “I don’t like to look at fire. I don’t like real fire. I only like pretend fire.” He went on, “Mommy, don’t do that again tomorrow.” I thought that’s pretty smart for a four-year-old.

His little brother is now in that terrible-two phrase and he wears me out everyday. He continues to pick up new words like, “love you,” “be careful” and “please.” Sometimes he combines two words into one, like “bloon” instead of “balloon” and “plice” instead of “police.” Unlike his big brother, Dan is still not into any particular TV shows. His favorite toy so far is a garbage truck. He uses the word “dơ” (dirty) more than anything. Whenever he sees something dirty he would say it. If we were driving on a rainy day, he would say “dơ” the entire time. He still can’t pronounce “truck” correctly. He would say, “dump fuck” instead of “dump truck,” which I find hilarious every time.

There are many funny moments that I haven’t have a chance to write down. I have been insanely busy these days. School has been very stressful. I have been quite cranky lately due to lack of sleep. I can’t wait for this semester to be done so I can get some rests and catch up on sleep. It’s Saturday night I am still doing my homework. Alright, I am going to sleep now before the little guy gets up and scream. Peace out!

We were driving home yesterday, Dan saw a truck and informed me, “Fuck, daddy.” Later on he yelled, “Dirty fucker.” I replied, “You mean, dirty tractor?” He responded, “fucker.” I think I need to contact a speech therapist or something. I must admit. I kind of enjoy his talk.

Last night, I came to realize that Dan replaces “tr” with “f” when he talks. For instance, he would say “frain” instead of train. As we were on the road yesterday, he screamed really loud, “Daddy, fuck dơ.” My wife and I couldn’t stop laughing. I asked him, “Con nói gì vậy?” He repeated, “fuck dơ” and pointed to a dirty truck on the road. When he grows older, I’ll remind him that he already started cussing when he’s not even two.

Dao is getting very complex with his speech. He picks up words fast and he applies them immediately. When I pointed out to him a car transporter, he would use that word as soon as he sees a truck that carries cars on the road. We were arguing yesterday over who saw the convertible Mustang first. As we went back and forth, he immediately said, “That’s enough.” Last Tuesday after picking them up at daycare, I told him that I have to go to class tonight and he said, “But I need a parent to watch me and my baby.” Of course I wouldn’t leave them without his mom. I am not that insane yet.

Since early summer, Dan started to sing “A ba dee… A ba dee” and clapped his hands or swing them up and down. The song has a nice melody. Even Dao and I started to sing along, but we had no idea what the song was about. I thought it was a Jewish song that he learned at summer camp. I asked his teachers and no one knew what Dan was singing about either.

Last weekend, my wife cracked the code and discovered that “A Ba Dee” is Dan’s unique rendition of “Happy Birthday.” If you ask him to sing “Happy Birthday,” he would sing “A Ba Dee.” If you listen closely you can hear the similarity. Dan has the tendency to skip words and somehow he hears things differently. He still says “fucker” instead of “tractor.”

I am not sure if this is his gift or his curse. On one hand, it’s hard to understand the things he says. On the other hand, he completely invented a new melody from such a familiar song. In a way, that is what jazz musicians had done most of the time when they reinterpreted a standard. I am finding this development from Dan to be quite fascinating. I can’t wait to sing “A Ba Dee” when he turns two.

Our little guy is approach two and he is unstoppable. He has endless energy and no sense of fear. Whenever the three of us (without mom) hang out, I have to focus most of my attention on Dan and that makes me feel bad for Dao. If I keep on eye off him something would happened like falling off the playground, diving off the couch to the hardwood floor or getting his hand stuck in the elevator door. Yet he never learned his lesson.

He is starting to talk quite a bit as well. Some words he could say very clearly, but some he couldn’t. Dao was spot on whatever word he heard or said. Even when repeating something I said, Dan could not said it correctly. For example, we were looking at the book on cars last night and I said to him “tractor.” He repeated, “fucker.” I was like, “No, no, no, not that. It’s tractor.” He repeated again, “fucker.” I gave up and switched to Vietnamese.