In another hour and half, 2010 will be gone. While waiting for the countdown, let’s take a quick retrospection.

2010 treated me not so bad at all. Our little family was doing great. It was a wonderful experience to see Dao’s progression from walking to talking to learning something new everyday. It was a joy to see him grows and I am looking forward to even more exciting activities from him next year.

In the tough economy Dana and I managed to pull through. Although I am glad that neither of our job was affected, I hope that we will do even better next year.

As for my work as GWSB, the Unified Web Project was one of the best things that happened at the university. I had a chance to know and work with a group of talented web developers from various schools within GW. I am looking forward to more collaborative effort next year.

Looking back at my own work, I am very proud with the sites I have launched, particularly Sketches of Miles, Le Mekong Vietnamese Cuisine, Julie Tran Law, Easy License Renewal and United Green Solutions. I am looking forward to more exciting projects next year.

So 2011, bring it on.

After hitting the publish button on my last post about my dad, my phone rang. A cousin in Viet Nam called and we talked briefly about my dad. Since his retirement, he seems bored and lonely. He doesn’t go anywhere and just stays in the house his older brother provided to him.

One of the strengths on my dad side of the family is that they take great care of each other. Even my gambling uncle is provided with care. As long as he doesn’t gamble, he could have a place to stay. I appreciate the family’s structure and foundation. We respect the elders from the top down through many generations. My dad once told me that his oldest brother is like his parent after my grandparents passed away. The problem with my dad though he doesn’t know how to balance between his big family and his immediate family. The result is that we always come second to his big family.

That was his decision and as a son all that I can do is respecting his choice. Even now when is all by himself, he doesn’t even express that to me. Our communication is totally wrecked. I was thinking to myself yesterday. What if I just take two or three weeks off go back to Viet Nam and just lock myself in with him 24/7. We’ll just hang out and travel together as father and son, something we had never done. Will that help reconnect our relationship?

While driving home, Dana said to me, “You and your dad doesn’t have much to say to each other, huh?” I nodded my head agreed.

My dad calls my mom every Saturday morning. Since we were in town, mom handed me the phone and I did the same thing I do every time I talk to him. I asked him about his health and then the rest of his brothers and sisters. After that we just stayed silence and I handed the phone back to my mom. She then passed the phone to Cu Dao so he could say, “Hello Ong Noi” (Hi grandpa).

My relationship with my dad is actually better than ever, but the distance between us physically and emotionally is still far away. Even though the time we spend apart is way too long, he is still my dad and I will do anything I can for him. He never asks me for anything since he must have felt that he has not done much for me. I learn everything about him through my mother. Even after we spoke over the phone, I had to ask my mom about his health and if he needed anything.

Plenty of time I told myself to get over the past and let just pick up where we left off, but then where do we start? We are now living in two different worlds. Will our worlds ever become one again? Will we ever be under the same roof again? Right now I don’t have an answer and I don’t think he does either. We’re just letting time passing us by.

I got home from work around 6:15pm, but Dana and Duke weren’t home. After taking a shower, I could hear them in the living room. Dana handed Duke over to me to give him a bath so she could cook some dinner. I fed him a bowl full of porridge and hang out with him while Dana was still cooking.

I peeped into the kitchen and there were Vietnamese salad, mussels and lobster tails. I asked her what is the special occasion? She replied, “It’s our anniversary.” Holy crap, I totally forgot about it. I popped open a bottle of white wine, the one that I brought to her place the first time she invited me over for dinner. I was so nervous that I dropped the bottle on the floor and we had to clean it up.

Anyway dinner was delicious. We had to rush a bit because Cu Dao was sleepy and fussy. Dana put him to bed so I just kick back and watched some American Idol. Crystal Bowersox dominated the show and she’ll win for sure. Then Glee came on. I was expecting more of Lady Gaga covers, but it was not the case. The show was still enjoyable though.

After the show, I clean up the table and put the dishes into the machine. Dana came down and now we’re sharing a chocolate mousse and a cup of tea while I quickly put this post together before the night end.

I called my old man last night and he happened to be doing some work at the temple he helped built when I was five. He handed the phone over to chi My Chau, the youngest monk who treated me like her little brother when I lived in the temple. We chatted and she brought back some of the fondest memories of my life. I ran from the school back to the temple without my books and bag because I was afraid of getting flu shot. She remembered the times she walked me to school and picked me up at the end of the day. She reminded me our favorite dish: “gasoline” fried rice. I once asked Su Co (the second highest monk) how she made such delicious fried rice and she told me she used gasoline. The joke stuck.

One of the biggest reasons I loved to stay at the temple was chi My Chau. We played together and she made me all kind of fun toys like kites, coconut-leaf animals, paper airplane and plastic lanterns. We lived a simple life. We woke up in the morning. We prayed with Su Co and Su Ba (the highest monk). We had meatless breakfast and I headed to school. After school we had lunch, we prayed and then I got to take a nap. After that I got up, played and watered the flowers. We had some time to study before dinner was served.

Chi My Chau, who is at least five years older than me, is one of the sweetest ladies I have met in my life. I don’t know exactly how she ended up at the temple and I don’t know much about her background. Unlike me she was either born to be a monk or she didn’t have a choice. She was sent to the temple and that is how she lives for the rest of her life. She got to go to school, but never got to experience the life outside the temple. Sometimes I think about her and keep wonder how she does it.

I still recall my last day at the temple. Chi My Chau was sad and mad at me for leaving. I could see the disappointment written all over her face. She seemed lonely. Until this day, I could never forget that expression. From that moment on, my life had changed forever.

I went back home and started first grade. At the time, I was obsessed with video games (Contra, Natra and Mario Brothers), billiards and Chinese TV series (Natra, Te Thien, Vo Tat Thien). I even stole money from my mom to feed my addiction. I can’t even imagine how messed up my life would have been if I didn’t come to America.

Migrated to the States was another life-changing experience for me. I was lonely and felt as if I was deaf and muted. I couldn’t make any friends and I couldn’t hang out with American kids. I got picked on and laughed at. At that point, I really missed the time I was living in the temple. I loved the calmness atmosphere and the times I spent with chi My Chau. I had thought of going back, but it was impossible at that time and my mind was already corrupted. There is no turning back, but I still hope one day I could go back to the temple and relive some of that peaceful experience.

The wedding turned out to be one of the happiest days of my life. Although it was not perfect (which wedding is perfect?), I am proud of the fact that we had made the most out of it. So here is a brief recap of how the day went.

I woke up at five thirty in the morning. Aunt 9 who flew in from Texas and I took a walk around the park to catch up on family matters. We went back to my mom’s little apartment to get ready. Our family left together from my sister’s house at a bit passed eight to get to the bride’s resident in Flanders, New Jersey for the ceremony. We arrived a few blocks from the house to get everyone together for the walk-in tradition. The ceremony was kept short, simple but no less moving. The bride looked gorgeous in the red traditional dress (ao dai). She was indeed the brightest star of the day. The most memorial part of the morning is when both side of the family were in tears. They were happy for both of us.

After the ceremony, light brunch was served. At that time Dung and I escaped the scene with the photographer for some photo shoots at the gorgeous campus of Princeton University. We hit a bit of snag trying to find the place we wanted because we weren’t familiar with the area. Big thanks to the photographer for being patience with us. Not sure how the photos will turn out, but he did a great job of getting us relax and felt comfortable in front of the camera.

The reception, which took place at Golden City Chinese Restaurant, was to start at six thirty, but we were there at six because the campus photo shoot turned to be longer than what we had planned. Thanks to my wife’s sister and her future husband for setting up the whole place for us. When we got there the place looked warm, intimate and elegant. Guests began to arrive at around six thirty and the place almost filled at seven thirty so we got the party started.

Big thanks to our beautiful MC with a lovely voice for holding down the program. After visiting my blog and having read our Love Notes, she was able to incorporate some of the lyrics into her introduction. Father of the bride gave a warm, heartfelt speech thanking our guests for coming. My speech also turned out decent after I had a few drinks.

What kept the wedding exciting had to be the music band. Thu Hoai and the Magic Night band brought down the house. Thanks Thu Hoai for covered Ngo Thuy Mien’s “Niem Khuc Cuoi” with such a romantic vibe as well as the special dedication to my mother with “Me Hien Yeu Dau.” The young crowd at my table loved her version of “Vi Do La Em” without even clear understanding of the lyrics. Big props go to the band for keeping everyone on the floor all night long. We started our first dance early on so that folks could come out and dance. We even chucked out the traditional formal greetings so that people could have more time to enjoy the music. Dung and I went around and greeted everyone individually.

The music was great. The wine was tasty. The cake was awesome. The food was fantastic. Everyone seemed to enjoy the party. Most folks stayed and danced until eleven thirty at night. Everything was perfect until the next day. About a dozen of folks including myself got sick from the food. I am still recovering and hopefully I can go on to Jamaica tomorrow. I apologize to anyone who came to the reception and got sick from the food. I made the call to the restaurant immediately and the owner blamed it on the weather. Although the food was good, I wouldn’t even reconsider Golden City Chinese Restaurant for future occasions. Once again, I truly apologize.

The documentary section of Van Son in Philippines brings back so much memories, especially the reminiscing part of Bataan where I had lived for six and a half months. Fifteen years has passed, but that special place, which was filled with sorrow, joy and anxiety, has not once departed from my heart. Coincidentally, Van Son and I were in the same 136’s cycle, which means we arrived in Bataan about the same time; therefore, most of the things he said hit my recollecting chord: the bunk camp (two families jammed in one little crib), the stringed bridge (cau treo), the food-distributing arguments (mom was responsible for dividing up the foods), the “monkey house” (for misbehaviors), the monastery and the entertainment park. One thing Van Son didn’t mention that holds a personal memory for me was the ping-pong recreation. I used to make my own paddles from either a piece of flat wood or blackboard. They weren’t the best, not to mention that they were square shaped instead of round, but they gave me an opportunity to learn how to play. The net was made up of a stick placed on two bricks. It was the coolest game ever. Even though those days were not heaven, they were not so bad comparing to the unfortunate ones who still stuck there. It’s heartbreaking to see our people being alienated in a foreign country, and still struggling after fifteen years trying to find a better place to live. Let’s hope and pray for those who are still left behind to reach their final destination.

My break has been good so far. Spending time with family and friends and mostly with Samantha and Eric (my niece and nephew). They are so adorable and it is just a joy to watch them play and grow.

I have been eating like crazy too. Finally getting some real Vietnamese food such as Bun Mam and Canh Mang. I took some photos and will post them when I get back to Poughkeepsie. I will probably create a food catagory so you can drool on.

Today, I went back to La Salle to pick up my transcript in order for me to take some classes at Vassar. While I was there, I visited some of my professors and classmates in the DArt program. Here is a photo of me and Prof. McCoey featuring on La Salle’s portal. It was nice to see them again.

I also picked up quite a few Vietnamese CDs in Philly’s Chinatown. Actually 10 altogether (mostly Tuan Ngoc, Nguyen Khang and Ngoc Lan) so I can enjoy for two weeks and during the road trips.

That’s it for now. I’ll be back later. It’s time to hit the park with my hommies for some volleyball games. Peace out!

While wandering around Adriance Memorial library yesterday, I encountered Jet, a friend of my uncle from Boston. Haven’t seen him for a while but he still remembered me. Great memory for an 80 years-old man, isn’t he? He told me about his road trip to trace back his ancestors. He was at the library searching for information on his great uncle’s wife who used to live in the area. He also told me that he is pursuing a master degree in History. Although he is taking one class at a time, he has completed 4/10 courses. Isn’t that amazing? 80 years old and still has the determination to learn. After about an hour, I let him go back to his work and headed to Barnes & Noble.

Upon arriving the bookstore, I ran into an elder gentleman who I had met many times at the bookstore and the library but never actually talked. I held the door to let him in as he asked me a few questions regarding of what I do for a living. So I told him that I am a web designer at Vassar College. He was quite interested in technology and asked me if I use Macromedia Flash, Macromedia Director, Adobe Photoshop and so on. After answering his questions, I asked him what he does for a living. He gave a whole spill on how society classifies him as a retard so he taught himself by reading books and following up with technologies. I have witnessed a number of people giving him that “retarded” stare at the library but when talking to this man, his mind is nowhere near retard. Although I haven’t seen his work, he had impressed me his knowledge on technology at the age of 60. I don’t think I will have that much knowledge by the time I hit 50.

After settling down and diving into Lynne Truss’s Shoots, Eats & Leaves, Andrew Meade, Assistant to the Dean of the College, dropped by to say “hi.” Andre is highly respected by the Vassar community and to me he is an extreme down to earth gentleman. It turns out that he is doing his dissertation for his PhD and using the bookstore as a resource. He spends time at the bookstore as much as I do and the only different is that he is doing his research and I am just drinking Caramel Frapuccino and wasting my time.

While these three gentlemen are extending their knowledge to the fullest, I am not doing much. Although I am currently doing fine, I still feel the urge to move forward. I have a wonderful job. I am doing what I always wanted to do. I stay on top of the web game. I hone my skills constantly. Now what? I desperately need challenge. Web design, no doubt, is always a challenge but I can deal with it both technically and creatively to solve the problem.

So what is my biggest problem? It’s still English. Although I have been in the United States for more than 12 years, my English is still something that I haven’t conquered. When I was in college, my concentration was mainly on design and technology. I thought that good design ruled but now I realized content is the king. So English courses were my worst nightmares even though I had a few professors who would go the extra miles to help me out. I just wanted to get it done and over with and now I am deeply regretting it.

After a night of awaking and thinking, I rushed to work this morning and went straight to the Dean of Studies Office to remind them of my application I applied last April 2003. It turned out that they had lost my application; therefore, they hadn’t contacted me. Even though I will have to go through the whole process again I am glad they lost my application because I was applying for Computer Science last year. So now I am gathering my transcript and letters of recommendation to get me back in school. Although I am applying for English major, I am just going to take a few courses to help my writing. However, I will continue if everything goes smoothly. I don’t have to drop a dime on my tuitions what do I have to loose.

I would like to borrow Nguyễn Nhất Huy’s “Tình Mẹ” (Mother’s Love) to show you my appreciation.

“Mẹ đã có phút dấu nước mắt cho con thơ ngây nụ cười. Mẹ đã có những lúc thức trắng cho con bao đêm ngủ say.” (There were moments you hid your tears to bring me laughter. There were times you stayed up all night just so I can have a good sleep.)

Happy Mother’s day! You deserve every moment of it. You mean the whole world to me and there is not a single second that I don’t think of you. You are my love, my life, my motivation, and my inspiration. You spend all your life focus on me. You worked hard everyday just so I can have a better life. You lay all your hopes and dreams on me. All my life, not only you never put your hands on me but also you would never let anyone else touch me. I remember one time you were arguing with dad because he puts his hands on me. Thank you for protecting me all through my life and I am deeply sorry for all the drama I put you through. I know I was not a good kid but you never gave up on me.

Thank you for brought me into this world and never stop loving me. You are the reason that I live and survive in this world. As a kid, I was always sick. Every year, I would spend at least a week in the hospital and you never left my side during those times. At one time, we both witnessed the girl my age passed away in the hospital right next to us. We could not control our emotions. She was just talking to us the day before. Similar to me, she was diagnosed with malaria but her parents brought her to the hospital too late. You would never let that happen to me. You knew exactly when it was time for me to check in the hospital even though we did not have a whole lot of money. Just thinking of all the sweet things you did for me, I cannot hold my tears. You are the greatest.

I pray everyday for your health and I am glad that you are taking great care of yourself. I can’t imagine living in this world without you. I will go insane. You have worked hard all your life, it’s time to relax and enjoy yourself. I can take care of myself now so please do not worried about me anymore. In your heart, I am still your little twelve years old kid even though you have given me plenty of wisdom to stand on my own two feet. I love you with all my heart and I just want you to know, you’re appreciated.