Dan: Donuts! (as we passed Dunkin’ Donuts)
Dad: Not this morning buddy.
Dao: That donut place was not there when I was a baby.
Dad: You’re right. It was built when Dan was a baby.
Dao: Yes. I went to the hospital to see mommy and Dan when he was a baby.
Dad: Do you want another baby brother or sister?
Dao: I want another baby brother.
Dad: You don’t want a baby girl?
Dao: No, I already have a girl?
Dad: Who?
Dao: Mommy!
Dao: Daddy, today is show and tell.
Dad: Did you bring anything?
Dao: Yes, my train.
Dad: What are you going to tell about your train?
Dao: My train is very very fast.
Dad: Is it reliable?
Dao: No, it’s just a toy train.
Dad: Do you know what reliable mean?
Dao: No.
Dan: Daddy, are you OK?
Dad: Yes.
Dan: Daddy, are you OK?
Dad: Yes.
Dan: Daddy, are you OK?
Dad: Yes. I am OK.
Dan: Daddy, are you tired?
Dad: Yes.
Dan: Daddy, are you tired?
Dad: Yes.
Dan: Daddy, are you tired?
Dad: Yes. I am tired.
Dan: Daddy, are you sleepy?
Dad: Yes. I am very sleepy.
Dan: Daddy, you’re a sleepyhead [Smurf reference].
At dinner last night, I shared with my wife a few things about Duke Ellington I have been reading. I said that he was a spoiled child. Dao asked me, “What does spoiled mean?” My wife replied to him, “What do you think it mean?” He said, “It means when you get a lot of toys.” My wife and I both know that Dao is a bright kid and he’s also very stubborn. The combination makes him a hard-headed child to deal with.
I notice his behavior has changed drastically in the past year. He enjoys going to school and interacting with his friends. At home he plays well with his brother except when Dan plays with the toys that he liked. For instance, when Dan played with a garbage truck he tried to take it away from Dan. If Dan wouldn’t give it up he would start a fight. I stepped in tell him that Dan is playing with it at the moment he needs to wait for a bit. He would start to lose control if he couldn’t get what he wants. When that occurred I sent him to timeout.
Once Dan is done playing he would give it to Dao. Dan usually doesn’t play with a toy for too long. Dao thanked him and then he moved on. As soon as he grabbed a train, Dao wanted that train as well even though we have ton of trains in the house, he had to have the one Dan was playing with and then we go through the same timeout again. This behavior of his is driving me off the wall and I can’t seem to get through to him at the moment.
Như thường lệ sau khi đọc xong hai quyển sách thì tôi tắt hết đèn để thằng Đán ngủ. Hôm qua mệt quá nên tôi thiếp đi. Đến 9:30 giật mình thức dậy thì thấy nó vẫn chưa ngủ. Khi đưa tay ôm nó thì tôi đụng cái tả. Ngạc nhiên là tại sao tả lại rớt ra. Tôi bật đèn đọc sách lên thì thấy nó đã lột hết cả quần lẫn tả và đang nằm vuốt cu. Cái trò này hơi bị mới.
Hôm qua là ngày tổng thống đáng nhớ.
The following report came from one of Dao’s teachers:
Yesterday, we went to the gym and we saw a few bugs and the children were very intrigued about them, so today we asked them.
Miss Rachael: What did you guys see in the gym?
Kassie: We saw a bug
Alex: we saw a stink bug.
Eva: I think I saw 5 stink bugs. There were one had 2 babies and the other had 1 baby.
Miss Rachael: What do you know about bugs?
Dao: if you squish them, they die.
I never taught him that.
Because Dao is eloquent with language, Dan picks up his motor skills from him as well. The other day, Dan dropped a container of cereal while we were riding to the daycare. He said slowly, “I spilled cereal… Dao can you pick them up?” Early today, I was putting on his diaper and joked with him, “Cu đẹp đâu rồi?” (Where is your pretty penis?) He tried to take off his diaper and replied, “Let me show you. Let me show you.”
Hôm qua khi đến đón hai thằng nhóc thì thấy cu Đạo nhảy nhóc trên sân khấu cùng bạn bè và cô. Bây giờ nó không còn nhát như xưa nữa. Trong lớp Đạo được cô khen và bạn bè mến. Sáng hôm qua khi đưa nó đến lớp thì có một em chạy ra ôm nó. Ở nhà thì Đạo cũng ngoan một tí. Chịu chơi với em. Dỉ nhiên cải nhau thì vẫn chưa tránh được.
Hôm trước nghe mẹ nó kể lại khi thay đồ cho nó bụng nó nhỏ quá nên má nó bảo con phải ăn nhiều để bụng con lớn như ba và em. Nó trả lời mẹ cũng phải ăn nhiều để bụng mẹ bự và mẹ ăn thật nhiều để mẹ cũng có cu như ba, em và Đạo. Cái này hơi nguy hiểm. Mẹ ăn nhiều mà mọc cu thì ba cho mẹ chết đói luôn.
Hôm qua nó thấy đứa bạn có một em gái nhỏ nó nói rằng nó cũng muốn em gái. Mẹ nó trả lời làm sao mà kiếm được thí nó nói mình phải đi ra ngoài tìm.
Cu Đán thì dạn hơn anh nó. Khi đến đón nó thì nó nói với cô giáo rằng, “Bye bye, have a good day.” Rồi chạy lại ôm cô và được cô hôn trước khi ra về. Có lẻ nó gần gủi với anh nó nên nói được rất nhiều và biết dùng nguyên câu. Lúc nó giận lên thì nó sổ tiếng gì chẳng nghe được gì cả.
Đán ăn uống nhiều và tối nào cũng phải thay ích nhất là 3 cái tả. Không thay là ngày hôm sau phải đem mềm gối đi giặt. Tướng nó thì to và khoẻ nên bây giờ nó đập thằng anh nó. Cu Đạo phải chạy và cầu cứu khi giành giật đồ chơi với thằng em.
Có hai thằng thì cải cọ đánh nhau là chuyện thường tình. Nhưng đánh đó rồi cũng xin lỗi và chơi với nhau.
Dealing with children’s fever is daunting. While staying up all night checking on Dan’s temperature in the past two days, I came across an informative guide from the Children’s Hospital of Eastern Ontario to help me demystify fever.
Fever is the body’s normal way of fighting infection. It alerts us to keep an eye on our child. Normal temperature is between 97°F–100.4°F. A child has a fever if his temperature is higher than 100.4°F.
Fevers between 100.5°F–105°F are common in children with illnesses. The height of the fever does not necessarily correlate with severity of illness. We treat children with fever reducing medication to make them more comfortable. Never wake a child just to take a temperature or to give fever reducing medication. Fevers are generally not dangerous until they are over 107°F. Children under 3 months of age with a temperature over 100.4°F should see a doctor.
If a child has a fever, dress him in light clothes and encourage him to drink fluids. Avoid bundling him in heavy blankets. Sponge and cool baths are not recommended and may make a child more uncomfortable. If you choose to use a fever reducing medication, we recommend either acetaminophen (Tylenol) or ibuprofen (Motrin or Advil). We do not recommend alternating these medications or giving them at the same time. These medications will reduce the temperature 1-2 degrees and last several hours. Reducing a temperature to normal is not necessary because a little fever can be beneficial in helping a child fight infection. How a child looks and acts is more important than the number on the thermometer.
Parents are often concerned that a child’s fever will cause a seizure. It is important to note that the risk of seizures is very low. In addition, seizures from fever are not known to cause any long-term problems.
The past two weeks had been fun but also exhausted. Being a full-time dad is not as easy as I had imagined.
The first week was not so bad since we were on an all-inclusive vacation. We got up around 8, got to breakfast about 9. Around 10 we headed to the swimming pool or the beach. The kids jumped around all over in the shallow water. I just had to keep an eye on them, which was not an easy task because of a few topless sun-bathers around. The mojito kept me focused on the kids.
After that we would head to lunch. At this point the kids got tired and ready for nap. Dao is the exception so I had to push him on the stroller around the property until he would fall asleep. Then I would stop at the bar, picked up a drink, headed to the beautiful landscape area. Let him listened to the waterfall while I enjoyed reading a book.
Once they woke up, we headed into the water again until dinner time. They were once again exhausted so they would go to bed early. Even though we were on vacation, we all went to bed around 9. Other than Dan running all around the property, getting out of his high chair and running all over the restaurants, we had a good time.
Once we headed back to the States, my day started at six in the morning forcefully and didn’t end until 10pm at night. That’s a sixteen-hour shift. When Dan had a fever at night, I was on call as well. I couldn’t sleep and had to check his temperature every fifteen minutes or so. On a good day, I was too exhausted to do my own things after 10pm.
The good thing was that the holiday season in DC has many model train exhibitions. Each day I tried to take them to different show. Staying home a whole day with them would give me massive headaches. The raining days and they days my wife was sick were the worse.
Then again, time spent with them went by so fast. Two weeks also come to an end. I am getting a cold myself. After tomorrow, I go back to work and they will go back to daycare. Life will be back to normal again.
The other day we were jamming to the remix version of Thanh Thảo’s “Bạc Trắng Tình Đời” in the car and Đạo asked me the meaning of the hook: “Thà là bỏ đi hết ta làm lại từ đầu.” I explained to him, “Well, you know when you watch a movie in the car and you ask me to restart the DVD. That’s what it mean.” He was like, “Oh, OK.” I am not even sure why I made such a terrible analogy.
Because of Đạo’s verbal skill, Đán is picking up his chops as well. He speaks with authority. He uses phrases like “Muốn coi TV” (Want to watch TV), “Muốn ăn phở” (Want to eat phở) and “Muốn iPhone.” The other day, he put his hand into his diaper and got poop on his fingers. He ran to me and said, “Trời ơi… My hand… Dơ quá” (Oh God… my hand… so dirty).
Đán is a handful. He’s strong; he’s big; he likes to run; and he has endless energy. His terrible-two phase is much worse than Đạo. Just two days ago, he was like a little sick puppy. Yesterday, he returned to his normal self and he is exhaustive to keep up. Then again, I am glad that he’s healthy.
Dao has strong language development. He takes responsibility for his actions. Dao is easily able to understand why some behaviors are inappropriate for school.
We are working on encouraging Dao to participate more in circle and story times. We are also encouraging him to participate in art and cooking activities despite his aversion to getting dirty.
I was surprised that his teachers gave him positive feedback on his behavior. He gets along well with his classmates and he listens to his teachers. Even when he does something inappropriate, he recognizes it and understands the consequences.
At home, he is different. He always fights with his little brother over toys. Whenever Dan plays with something, he takes from his brother despite how many times I tells him not to do that. Dao is fighting for attention. Whenever I get the chance to be alone with him, he is so sweet and well-behaved. I am still struggling to get the two of them to play well together.
Yesterday they fought over a toy and I confiscated it. I explained that if they can’t share, they won’t get to play the toy at all. Dao picked up another toy and threw it across the room. I made him sat on the coach. He started to cry. Dan came over and gave his brother a big hug. I was angry and touched at the same time.