Yesterday morning, Đán said he wanted to read. I showed him an alphabet book and asked him to tell me the letters. He could only identify D, A, N, and O.
In the evening I picked him up from daycare and we went to the library. He took out a dinosaur book and a cookbook. As we drove home, he started to read the cookbook.
I wish I had recorded his reading because he was so hilarious. He sounded like Trump’s rambling. Here’s one that I could remember:
Three, four, five, six million years ago, vegetable was made out of barf. It tasted so yucky like having an AK47 shot you in the face.
He obviously hated vegetables and somehow managed to incorporate his favorite Nerf gun toy into the story. He turned the page and read on:
Muffin is more gooder. It tastes yummy but has twenty hundred infinity sugar. You have lots of cavities. Cavity is bad. It makes your teeth fall out.
Although he can’t read, he has the potential to be president. He knows how to evoke fear.