Things I Shouldn’t Say

I am not a social guy, partly because I tend to say the wrong things, especially when making the first impression. In order to keep the conversation going, sometimes I just say silly things without thinking. For example, I had a brief elevator conversation with one of Duke’s friends’ mom at the daycare when I picked him up yesterday. She was a very nice, friendly lady. She introduced herself and told me her name, yet the name escaped me. I asked her to repeat her name before we left the building and I still can’t remember. I am pretty bad with names.

In any rate, she asked me where I was from while we were waiting for the elevator. I replied Vietnam and I ask her the same thing. She said, “I am from here.” Of course she’s from here. She’s Caucasian. She told me that she loves Vietnam, one of her favorite vacation spots. Here comes the trapped question, “Where in Vietnam did you go?” She began to stutter, “Well, Saigon… Ho Chi Minh City… the beach…” I quickly helped her out, “Vung Tau.” She went on, “We did the whole tour.” I was not trying to quiz her. The question just came to mind.

One time I had dinner with someone I met for the first time. We exchanged some basic questions. She pretty knew everything she needed to know about me from reading this site so she was pretty much reconfirming if Duke is my kid and all sorts of things. We did the same thing and she told me that she was Catholic. About twenty minutes later we were talking about some random politics and came the dumb question from me, “What is your position on abortion?” Then I realized didn’t she just tell me she’s Catholic?

After a few email exchanges, I talked to my client over the phone for the first time. We did the basic conversation and all. She told me that her husband has a job oversea so that’s why she is not living in the States. I asked her what company her husband work for. After she told me the name and came the idiotic remark from me, “that company still exists?” Again, I was not trying to be offensive or anything. The words just came out. I hope she understood.

Years ago when I was interviewing for a job, I was so focusing on answering the questions, that by the time it was my turn to ask, I felt like I already knew what I wanted to know. During the interview, one of the questions was, “What do you see yourself in five years?” I had to BS my way through. So when it was my turn to ask, I did the same thing, “Where do you see the direction of the web for your company in five years from now?” The four interviewers looked at each other like what in the world is this guy talking about. At least one of them being honest, “We don’t know.” If I were to give the same answer, I might have had the job.