Little Brat

His fingers are too short to stride, but Jamie Cullum has a bit of the keyboard chops, and if he would shut the fuck up and just bang out piano chords, I might consider him a serious musician. Until then, he still is a juvenile clown trying to get his swag on. Sure, he could play some quick, slick, and ear-candy solos, but could he extend beyond those? None of his song on Twentysomething leaves room for instrumental improvisation, and his singings take up most of the time. As for his vocals, dude sings (on “These Are the Days” and “All At Sea” for examples) like a spineless little bitch who does nothing but whine, moan, and groan in a hoarse British voice. When listening to his cover of Cole Porter’s “I Get a Kick Out of You,” I sure want to stomp my foot up his ass, and smack the shit out of him for derogating Jimi Hendrix’s “The Wind Cries Mary.” But he is so spontaneous and energetic that ditsy chicks are willing to drop their panties for him. That’s all that really matters.

visualgui