What I missed the most about Tupac Shakur a.k.a. Makaveli was his realness. True, he was a dope lyricist, but it was the sincerity in his delivery that brought his rhymes to life. So when he said, “Fuck the world,” I felt him. His death shook me because he always rapped about gun and annihilation as if he knew he would catch them sooner or later. His posthumous The Don Killuminati: The 7 Day Theory (the only piece of my ex I have not destroyed) sounds like he has planned his earthly departure.
On the opening “Bomb First,” Pac’s ferocity gushes like adrenaline rushes—as if it is his last chance to rhyme before fading to black. In the beginning of “Hail Mary,” he screams, “Uhh, feel me!” I could sense the hopelessness in his voice; therefore, when he rhymes, “I ain’t a killer but don’t push me / Revenge is like the sweetest joy next to getting pussy,” he was convincible. The antagonism continues on “Me and My Girlfriend,” a Pac’s version of Bonnie and Clyde that laced with sex and violence: “I love finger fucking you, all of a sudden I’m hearing thunder / When you bust a nut, Niggaz be ducking or taking numbers.” On “Just Like Daddy,” Pac wants to become a father figure to his girl and promises to take away her pain. Not sure how he would do that since he claims that you’re “screaming like you’re dying every time I am fucking you.” I suppose he takes away her emotional pain by giving her pleasurable pain. But that’s Pac, a man who had nothing to hide when it comes to speaking out his mind. And the self-expression is what I love about hip-hop.
A few readers still find it surprising when I write about hip-hop. Their perception is that I am not the hardcore or tough type of guy. What does my personality have to do with the music I listen to? My appreciation for hip-hop based purely on its aesthetic values: the beats, the flows, the rhymes, the structures, the techniques, the deliveries, the wordplays, the imageries, and the experiences. Hip-hop is a form of art that allows artists to truly bare their soul, and that was exactly what Pac did.