Addictions

I have been blogging for almost 20 years and I haven’t stopped. I find the freedom to write exhilarating. When I immersed myself into reading, I couldn’t stop. I find the pleasure of reading liberating. When I set my ear on jazz, I was hooked. I find the history and the art of improvisation to be hypnotizing.

I must have an issue with addiction or obsession. Once I hooked onto something, I just wanted more or to go all the way. I am not sure if it is good or bad. I don’t take the moderation approach. Go hard or go to hell. Fortunately, I never started smoking or using drugs. I don’t think I can dig myself out of those holes.

I had an issue with alcohol, but my gout, which is a curse and a gift, put my alcoholism under control. If I were with one or two drinking buddies, I could drink until my body couldn’t take anymore, which caused everything to come back out. Fortunately, those friends do not live close by.

I never wanted to go skiing, but my wife wanted me to do it with the kids. On our first skiing trip, I didn’t go because I refused to pay almost two hundred dollars for just one day. On the next trip, I gave it a shot to get my wife off my back. Then I was hooked. Skiing felt like flying even on a bunny slope. I ended up taking my kids on a ski trip every weekend in the winter right before the pandemic hit. I felt guilty because we blew five hundred dollars each day on skiing packages and food just for Đạo, Đán, and me. My wife, however, brushed it off. She encouraged us to go for it.

Then the pandemic hit and we were forced to stay home. We did some biking, but that quickly got boring. My wife suggested rollerblading. I thought she was out of her mind. Falling on concrete and getting hit by the cars on the streets seemed to be too dangerous for rollerblading. Then she bought us rollerblades. We started on the basketball courts when no one was playing. Then we discovered skateparks. I didn’t realize there were skateparks for skateboarding and rollerblading. I got hooked. I fell several times trying to do the drops, but I loved the vibe.

I used to ice skate a few times back in the days. I enjoyed it, but didn’t take it seriously until my kids and I started lessons. Ice skating is all about techniques. The more I learned, the more I wanted to build up my skills. Needless to say, I am also hooked on it. I felt like a little kid discovering a brand new world, except I am not a kid anymore. The learning curve is much steeper for me, but I am not competing against anyone else other than myself. I don’t have a goal, but I refuse to skate recreationally. I wanted to learn as much as I could just to prove to myself that I can do it.

I write because I enjoy expressing myself even if no one else would read it. I read because I enjoy gaining new knowledge and getting into someone else’s head. I listen to jazz because I enjoy the musical expressions the musicians created on the spot. I skate because I enjoy the feeling of being a kid again, something I missed when I was a kid.

Life is too damn short and I will leave this temporary place one day to meet up with my mom and dad. So just live it. YOLO!