I am sorry for all the yelling. I get frustrated every time you ignore my words. Bickering with your brothers is part of growing up, but it still drives me nuts. The beauty of being a kid is how quickly you move on without any emotional attachment. One minute you scream at each other, and yet five minutes later you play together again like best friends. When your mom and I fought, we didn’t talk to each other for days or weeks. I am making the change from watching you.
Even when I yelled at you, you still told me that you loved me or that you wanted me to be happy. You melted my heart and made me felt guilty all at once. I am not a perfect father, but I do my best. When you read this letter, I hope you will understand that my frustration stems from love.
I love waking up each morning and having breakfast together. I love hugging you and kissing you before dropping you off to school. I love accompanying you and your friends on field trips. Having school lunch with you takes me back to my childhood memories. Enjoying your mama’s cooking and playing at the playground have become activities I look forward to after work. I hope all of these simple yet treasurable moments we spent together outweighed the not-so-good times.
When we spend so much time together, joy and frictions are bound to happen. If I were to travel for work and only get to see you once in a while, I would be more doting. Thanks goodness, I don’t have to be in that situation. I had always yearned for quiet moments, and yet I missed all the craziness we had at home when I went away for a few days or a week. The grass is always greener on the other side.
If you learn to listen, I promise to be more patience. Let’s work together on that goal if you feel me.