Letter to My Sons #3

Dear sons,

I am sorry for all the yelling. I get frustrated every time you ignore my words. Bickering with your brothers is part of growing up, but it still drives me nuts. The beauty of being a kid is how quickly you move on without any emotional attachment. One minute you scream at each other, and yet five minutes later you play together again like best friends. When your mom and I fought, we didn’t talk to each other for days or weeks. I am making the change from watching you.

Even when I yelled at you, you still told me that you loved me or that you wanted me to be happy. You melted my heart and made me felt guilty all at once. I am not a perfect father, but I do my best. When you read this letter, I hope you will understand that my frustration stems from love.

I love waking up each morning and having breakfast together. I love hugging you and kissing you before dropping you off to school. I love accompanying you and your friends on field trips. Having school lunch with you takes me back to my childhood memories. Enjoying your mama’s cooking and playing at the playground have become activities I look forward to after work. I hope all of these simple yet treasurable moments we spent together outweighed the not-so-good times.

When we spend so much time together, joy and frictions are bound to happen. If I were to travel for work and only get to see you once in a while, I would be more doting. Thanks goodness, I don’t have to be in that situation. I had always yearned for quiet moments, and yet I missed all the craziness we had at home when I went away for a few days or a week. The grass is always greener on the other side.

If you learn to listen, I promise to be more patience. Let’s work together on that goal if you feel me.



Letter to My Sons #2

Dear sons,

I know sometimes you feel like your mom and I don’t pay attention to you and that we love your brothers more than you. I understand your frustration and anger when you argued or fought with your brothers. You might have wished your brothers didn’t exist. You might think that they had ruined your life.

On the contrary, your brothers shared not only blood, but also a special bond for life. One of the reasons your mom and I have four of you so that you will be there for each other for the rest of your lives. If something were to happen to me or your mom tomorrow, you will still have each other. When we will not be able to take care of you anymore, you will take care of each other.

So appreciate and treasure the time you spend with each other. Create long-lasting memories and trust each other. Do not let anyone, including your spouses in the future, get in between you and your brothers. Do not let money take over your relationships. We do not have any wealth to give you. We can only give you our love and your connection to each other.

Of course we would love to see all of you success in life, but if one of you fall down, help pull him up. Make sure you always look out for your brothers.



Letter to My Sons #1

My dearest Đạo, Đán, Xuân, and Vương

I have been away from you only for three days, but I already am missing you terribly. I miss seeing you play, hearing you calling me “Daddy,” and eating out together. I can’t wait to go home to kiss you, hold you, and play with you.

I am away from you to look after grandma. She had a flexor tenotomy. The doctor cut a tendon in her toe to ease her pain and to help her walk better. When he used a scalpel to trim off her callous, I went to the bathroom and vomited. I can’t deal with that kind of things too well.

After the procedure, grandma seemed to walk a bit better. In addition to taking care of her, I had a chance to spend some time with her and my sisters. Being around them reminded me of the good old time before I had a family of my own. I treasure these brief moments together with them. They are my love and of course they also love you dearly.

Living without you for a couple of days is hard, but it also gives me an opportunity to reflect and to think about our relationship. The simple fact is that the longer I am away from you the more I realize how much I love you. I can’t imagine being without you for weeks or months. I will see you guys soon.